Dear customer,
Giving away expensive toys and being rewarded through cookies, and good behavior is no longer a sustainable business model. Santa Claus in agreement with North Pole Company's LLC board of directors, understands the current global economic environment, and has decided to mitigate the effects of negative growth observed in the last four business quarters.
Euro zone austerity, shrinking foreign markets and the reduction of our investment portfolio has determined some changes in corporate policy. Shifting focus towards decreased spending, stock options renegotiations and considerable corporate downsizing, Santa Claus and all its subsidiaries will reduce workforce redundancy, prevent further damages being sustained and hopefully reverse this downtrend.
We regret to inform you that due to the global financial climate and North Pole's rising sovereign debt to over 65% of GDP, we can no longer continue providing our services free of charge. A modest monthly fee will be applied to all clients who wish to continue our business relationship. For underprivileged customers we offer free financial audit and counseling, also we will provide the same quality services if backed by mortgage or collateral guarantees.
With the best interest of its clients in mind, Santa Claus, North Pole Co. LLC and all its subsidiaries wish to express their gratitude for your continued business. Feel free to address your concerns to our Customer Care services.
Best regards,
Santa Claus, North Pole Co. LLC, Claus Investments & Securities LTD, Northern Defense Dynamics Corporation, Reindeer Systems Inc. and RedElf Equity & Asset Management.
Aforementioned financial entities property of Goldman Sachs & Co. All rights reserved.
Giving away expensive toys and being rewarded through cookies, and good behavior is no longer a sustainable business model. Santa Claus in agreement with North Pole Company's LLC board of directors, understands the current global economic environment, and has decided to mitigate the effects of negative growth observed in the last four business quarters.
Euro zone austerity, shrinking foreign markets and the reduction of our investment portfolio has determined some changes in corporate policy. Shifting focus towards decreased spending, stock options renegotiations and considerable corporate downsizing, Santa Claus and all its subsidiaries will reduce workforce redundancy, prevent further damages being sustained and hopefully reverse this downtrend.
We regret to inform you that due to the global financial climate and North Pole's rising sovereign debt to over 65% of GDP, we can no longer continue providing our services free of charge. A modest monthly fee will be applied to all clients who wish to continue our business relationship. For underprivileged customers we offer free financial audit and counseling, also we will provide the same quality services if backed by mortgage or collateral guarantees.
With the best interest of its clients in mind, Santa Claus, North Pole Co. LLC and all its subsidiaries wish to express their gratitude for your continued business. Feel free to address your concerns to our Customer Care services.
Best regards,
Santa Claus, North Pole Co. LLC, Claus Investments & Securities LTD, Northern Defense Dynamics Corporation, Reindeer Systems Inc. and RedElf Equity & Asset Management.
Aforementioned financial entities property of Goldman Sachs & Co. All rights reserved.
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| photo by Dan Pavel |
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